This episode should be subtitled “breaking body parts instead of hearts” because that is what happened.
The episode opens with David making the most eggs in the tiniest skillet leading into the invitation for the group date. On location, Becca is chopping it up with some women from the previous season, including the one that was “missing” and Tia. When the men arrive, they are informed they will be pampering the women, which is arguably the weakest date I have ever seen on the show. Colton is stressed out Tia is there because of, you know, their history.
Becca takes Tia aside to talk about Colton. Tia explains that Colton did reveal to her he had applied for the show shortly after they started seeing each other but they didn’t think he would be selected. Becca is worried about knowing whether Colton came on in hopes of the Bachelorette being Tia, but I don’t really see why that is a problem. If they have chemistry despite that, great. Why not let it play out?
Once everyone is dressed for the evening and gathered in the common area, Jean Blanc (colognes) squires Becca away apparently after to suggesting to the guys they all chill and talk to her as a group for a while. Is that shady or is it clever? I’m going to go with shady… Several of the men have their nails painted. They were so bored on that silly date they painted their own nails.
When Becca is alone with Jason, she tells him she has a crush on him to compensate for forgetting his name earlier. I don’t fault her for forgetting his name. There are around 20 men there and most of them look alike.
Meanwhile, David is trying to aggravate Jordan because Jordan makes him feel insecure. Apparently, Jordan had over 4,000 Tinder matches last year! I feel like that is a hell of a lot of swiping! Was he swiping right on everyone??? How were there even 4,000 candidates? Maybe because he travels a lot. Did you know he is a model? Either way, that’s a feat. Of course, David being a girl went and told Becca. He was trying to make Jordan seem like a player, but I think that could have made Becca feel insecure. She commented on it to Jordan but said she wasn’t bothered. In the one on one time with Jordan he said, “I know it’s hard with me being like, uh, a model,” I guess because of the attention. Then Becca asked what he is like in a relationship and he likened himself to a Golden Retriever… I think Jordan is really interested in Becca. I think she is open to getting to know him, but I don’t think anything is going to happen here. I can’t help but feel Jordan is the Corinne of this season- so bad he’s good.
As if we haven’t had enough, David returns to trolling Jordan and the men try their best not to laugh because it’s stupid. I admire Jordan for saying he doesn’t need to validate himself to David, but he eventually breaks and lets us know he’s a Wilhelmina model.
For the one on one date, Chris accompanies Becca to Capitol Records. They are joined by Richard Marx who wrote “Right There Waiting for You.” Would any of us have known that? They wrote a love song about their relationship but didn’t sing it. This scene was oddly intimate and not in a good way. Later we learn Chris was acting weird because his father abandoned him after he divorced his mom; it is hard for Chris to be open to love. Even though I was sympathetic to Chris’s past as was Becca, I don’t think they are the same speed.
The final group date centers around a football game. We get to see Clay, the NFL player, in his element, crushing it. Then he crushes his wrist and has to go to the hospital.
I forgot to mention that prior to this, David was sent to the hospital from a bloody scene. Chris Harrison very dramatically (how else?) tells Becca that David is in INTENSIVE CARE because he… fell out of his bed onto his face. *insert bugged eyes emoji*
Somehow Clay’s injured wrist turns into a life hinging dilemma. He possibly needs surgery. Does he leave and forfeit a chance at love, a chance to secure his future beyond the NFL? Or does he stay and give up his career? I don’t understand how staying and quitting professional football are one in the same. By then end of this I am not even sure if I really believe his wrist is broken. Maybe he just needed a reason to leave. He makes the right choice if there really was one, and he leaves, returning to Becca the group date rose she gave him.
Next week we will find out what’s going on with David’s face and I’m sure they will be some other musical guest and a cameo from a previous contestant. Stay tuned!