• life

    I Lost My Child’s Social Security Card and I’m Still Killing the Game

    I called the DEERS office Friday before my appointment on Monday to verify what time it was since I never received an email. “Wilson?” “No, Weldon. W-E-L-D-O-N.” “Oh, okay… I don’t see any appointments. Wellons, right?” This went on for over a minute. Since changing my last name, I had never had trouble spelling it for people, which is what I liked about it after growing up with a name evident of my Nigerian roots. She didn’t have an appointment for me even though I had called a week prior, but she put us in another slot on Monday and told me to bring the baby’s birth certificate. Here comes…

  • life

    Hi Ho, Hi Ho- Back to Work I Go!

    The funny thing about being given 12 weeks of maternity leave, paid, is that it means there’s a job I should return to. I actually found myself back at my desk two weeks early in order to save the last two weeks of leave for going home when my husband’s unit takes leave. When I envisioned having a child over the last 3 years I imagined I would be in a position where I was freelancing as a writer and able to stay home. When I envisioned having a child eight months ago, I thought I would just quit. I was so in denial about the fact I would have…

  • life

    Welcome to Parenthood!

      I walk out of the master bathroom, in a diaper, with milk streaming out of both of my breasts. My husband rushes and grabs the baby from my mom. I sit on the bed and nurse my son on the right while my husband starts the breast pump on the left. This is parenthood. This is Day 3. Day 1 With every ounce of strength in me I push a baby’s head out of my body and the rest of him follows, at 12:32 am on February 4th. He cries immediately in spite of the meconium that came out when my water broke. I thank God for that. My…

  • life

    Marriage: Year 3

    It occurred to me that each year I’ve written some sort of year end review about my marriage for my anniversary. Today is my third anniversary. Without looking back at my other essays on it, I know I’m not as happy and not as profuse as I was one year in. I don’t want to shy away from the realities of marriage and the Army, but I do understand how sensitive of a matter being honest actually is. I am not as happy as I was two years ago because stress exists, namely the fact my husband has been on a different continent for the last 5 months and I…

  • life

    Dis Tew Much

    About a week ago… This is officially too much. My fantasy is to evade work for a week. Actually, on my 40-minute lunch, and 20-minute break I lean all the way in and literally pretend like I don’t work. Something about not working because I can’t stop coughing or crying feels off base of that dream.  I had a rough weekend with physical exhaustion, stress, and nosebleeds and was finally motivated to figure out how to use my FMLA benefits at work. As soon as I initiated the process, I called out work for the second half of Monday. On Tuesday, I managed to stay clocked in for 30 minutes. Then…