• life

    Wife Out of Context

    Without the Army, I don’t know who I am or what I’m supposed to be doing; it’s like the week between Christmas and New Year’s, but without the glee. I’ve lost track of how old my toothbrush is. When did I last change my contacts? I’m lost in time and space. I don’t know where to put things. I don’t know what’s for dinner. One day my husband said the baby needed to stop coming into the bed with us in the mornings. I said one of us would have to get up with him then. He suggested that would be me since it always used to be, but that…

  • life

    An Update on the House…And My Sanity

    Three weeks ago I saw my new home for the first time and proceeded to meltdown for the rest of the week until moving in. I was so disappointed. Even made a YouTube video about it. I was being dramatic; it’s not that bad. However, I stand by my reaction. There was nuance, which I’ll get to later. By the time I posted the blog about the situation, I was kind of over it. By “over it” I mean I had come up with some neat little reason for why I was so emotional. But the following day as my son and I experienced escalating allergy symptoms, I became suspicious…

  • life

    Post Partum: What ‘SnapBack’?

    It took me a full year to get back to some resemblance of my pre-pregnancy size with exercising about three times a week and not following a diet post partum. I gained 43 pounds during my pregnancy. I exercised the whole time, but I certainly was not the marathon running, high speed type of pregnant person. I was huge, and I loved when people commented on it because I too found it impressive. And I kind of stayed huge after the baby came. After seeing so many women talking about snapping back, celebrities and real girls alike, I felt my story was important to add to the conversation. As a…

  • life

    Unhappy With My New Home

    I lie awake watching pimple-popping videos at 3 am on move-in day. I was stressed about moving into our new home which was, as far as I was concerned, a dump. The disappointment was real, but the anxiety was in galactic. The morning before, Friday, my husband and I sat in his car and debated who would run to QuikTrip—a gas station St. Louisans are obsessed with—for breakfast and who would stay with for the internet installation.  I volunteered to stay with the baby because that was most practical. Fifteen seconds later I burst into tears. I’ve cried a lot in life–well as much or less than any other woman–but…

  • life

    Leaving Fort Bragg: In My Feelings

    In less than 30 days, I will no longer be a bride on base. Despite how irritating it is to be a military family, my feelings about no longer being one are complicated. Since I’m high maintenance, I went to a counselor to discuss it rather than texting one of my friends. My husband will be released from the Army at the end of February. His five-year contract will be up in April. And we won’t be special anymore. You’re Not Hardcore Unless You Live Hardcore I think when I’m honest, that’s what I like about being a military spouse. Warranted or not, service members and their families are revered…